There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Monday, November 13


How can someone love me when I don't love myself? How? What makes up that kind of relationship? Not good... I am thinking, that is not good.


  1. It can be good sometimes. Sometimes when someone loves you, it actually makes you start to love yourself a little too. I'm there right now actually.

  2. Why not take a look at yourself through someone else's eyes, and acknowledge that you are lovable? It's worth a try.

  3. see, i have the Opposite problem.

    I think i really do love myself.

    I just have a problem with everyone else...

  4. I'm with BHD.
    Look at yourself through the eyes of someone who loves you.

  5. And this is why I don't fall in love with anyone. I'm still working on falling in love with myself.

  6. Karma: yea i am working on that.

    bhd: sistah. i am trying believe me. and not holding up too well.

    slyde: tried to comment on your blog,oh well. glad to know you are secure in your love.

    msI: thanks. like i said, its a tough one.

    mist: Comrade!

  7. Awwww, I think you're loveable. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're the best you that you can be and that should be good enough for anyone :)

  8. You're easy to love, Mellie
    Yeah, Don't be so hard on yourself.. Personally, I don't think about loving myself. I mean, I try to take care of myself, but mostly, because I have family that I want to be here for, in case they need me.

    I think a lot of Mom's are like that.. They don't take time for themselves, always trying to please and do for others.
    Do something special for yourself..
    Sort of like the Loreal commercial..You're Worth it...


  9. I agree. Do something nice for yourself. Any time I've tried to suck out the love for me from the love a man had for me (if that makes sense) it didn't end up well. Usually with me crying in a I have to say that old saying "you have to love yourself first" is totally true.

  10. Aw, I went through a self-loathing phase but I got over it.
    I agree that, ideally, it's best come to terms with yourself first. If you are emotionally vulnerable you could end up falling in love for the wrong reasons or allow him to mold you into someone you hardly recognize...and when the relationship ends, what are you left with?

  11. Apart from the fact that you have exceptionally pretty feet, it's obvious, isn't it, that your a sweetheart. How can you not love yourself? Isn't it time to do away with that business of self hatred?

    Yes, why yes! Of course it is. No-one here would agree with it!


  12. I agree, how can you not love those cute lil' toes.

    Interesting post - I'll be thinking about this one during the day.

    Thanks . . . Ben O.

  13. how can you NOT love yourself?

    You are the mother to a gorgeous 3 yo who melts everyone's hearts.....theres a whole lot to love where that little guy origionated from!

  14. good question....thought provoking.
    here's what i can take it or leave it. If you get together with someone at a time when you don't love yourself, the chances of that person being someone who TRULY loves you are slim.....and if they do, then your lucky. but on the other hand if you get together with someone when you do love yourself, the chances are very good that person loves you for you. i don't know if this makes sense, but i've never loved myself, and i chose two people in a row who didn't truly love me. and now? i'm totally working on loving myself and i bet you the third times the charm

  15. Have to take care of yourself and be happy in yourself before streching out...hard to do though!

  16. nonny: yea, I guess I am too hard on myself.

    Steph: Yes. I am feeling self loathing, which really isn't neglect its torture! LOL. yea. I should do something nice for myself.

    Loops: do you live close by? cuz i could use a good long chat and some coffee!

    Allison: can you come too? or do you prefer tea?

    ben: :blushes: its a good ponder. Brings you closer to self.

    goddess: don't know! its a tough one to break down. lots of pain there.but I am working on it.

    badoozie: I sure hope the third time is a charm works for you! we all deserve happiness. everyone.

  17. Thank you all for the supportive and kind words. I am feeling better today!

  18. I think you have to break what you are down to its most simple form. What are you? What are you about? Whom have you affected in this world during your stay here?

    You can't love what you are unless you know what you are.

    Brother Jas...

  19. yes jas. i was having a discussion with my IRL sis. We have family issues that lead us to self loathing. Must stop listening to the past, and be in the present!

    thanks sweety. much cyber sis love to you! :hugz:

  20. Maybe try a taking yourself on a few dates. Wine. Movies. A good steak. And after a few weeks when you're ready, a nice thick vibrator (you don't want to put out too soon).

  21. Erin has all the answers above.

    Just be sure to buy yourself some flowers afterwards.

  22. erin: welcome! yeeeehaw. steak dinner foreplay. oh yea.

    earl: flowers... thanks for checkin in.

  23. I like coffee and tea, but I'd prefer beer. ;)

    I'm adding a link to you on my blog BECAUSE YOU'RE WORTH IT