There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Thursday, November 9

The Poop

So, many of you readers know I have a son. He is three. He is NOT potty trained yet. Will NOT use the "potty". He is TERRIFIED of his own bowel movements! When he does have a movement, will hide in a quiet spot while his face gets red... and he does the typical sounds. I ask him, are you pooping? He says no as he grunts. And then happy bouncy boy when its passed! This movement is a powerful force in nature. Powerful.

Last night he got into his nice warm bubble bath, totally relaxed, and into the tub it went. He was beside himself! "Poop in the tub" he starts screaming and crying, practically mames the little german soldier to get out of the tub. It was all I could do to not laugh out loud at him. Instead I used calming gentle words, let him stand next to me and watch as I emptied the tub, and removed the aggressor log! Then I sat him on the potty explained why people use the potty, and that is where everyone's poop goes.

I am not interested in forcing him to "do it" on the toilet. I mean who needs therapy over a bowel movement. Its going to have to be a gradual process. But hell, does anyone have tips? I don't want him to have candy as a reward. A friend suggested cookies. I think that is a good idea. My thoughts are bribery is the only answer. He seems to take to that. And it may balance out his irrational thoughts of the demon "poop".

You know its an important step in life to be able to flush your poop away. And I am ready to get him to the "next level". Pampers has enough of my hard earned cash!


  1. Oh buddy, I wish I could help but I'm in the exact same boat. And I've been through it once before and it took till the boy was almost 5!

    My three year old went through a phase where he did use the potty, but then he decided he wanted to be a baby again and stopped just as suddenly. So we're back to pull-ups-frustrating as hell!

  2. My kid did the same thing once. Log in the tub. I laughed. She cried. She actually did poop in the toilet once, but it scared her and now she won't sit on the potty at all. I doubt there's anything we can do but wait for them to grow out of it.

    Do you guys know about the Pampers reward program?

  3. nonny: i do have the pull-ups. I am going to start using those real soon. well if its until 5, then i have a ways to go.

    loops: tell me about the program!

  4. I had to read this right when I was making lunch, right?

    Good luck with that.

  5. Jill used gold star stickers as a reward. That was a major motivator for Dylan. And when guests came over (or stayed over, as I did) they were encouraged to poop for a gold star, too. Even more motivating for Dylan.

    I got me a few gold stars. Even when I didn't earn them. Oh well!

    Then again, once Dylan crapped his Elmo pullups, and informed me by saying, "Poor Elmo."

    Go figure.

  6. I wish I could help but I am barely potty trained myself!

  7. Very few people go through life without learning how to use a potty. He'll get it. Until then, spread newspapers all over the floor.

  8. My mother tried to not force me...and still to this day she tells the story of the day I flung my poop and smeared it on the walls. ;)


  9. I never did use pull-ups , because I was told that would make it take longer to potty train..
    I let mine run around the house( it was on a couple of weekends) butt naked ,and after about three weekends of doing that, they were potty trained. I got that from Dr. Phil years ago..

  10. omgsh - potty training is THE WORST.

    I have NO advice. NONE.

    I'm just barely through with my girl and DREAD it with my boy.

    *shivers in corner*

  11. steve novak is like a little shit throwing monkey

    i like his style

    i just stopped by to claim your soul

    i did not expect to be regaled with tales of potty training angst

  12. Hi:)
    very interesting.
    thnx for the visit.

  13. I just went through this with my three year old granddaughter. She wouldn't go, wouldn't go, wouldn't go, then one day she just started using the potty on her own.

    The only incentive I used with her was stickers. No stars or anything, just sticker (like Scooby Doo, SpongeBob, etc.) I gave her one with every success and she could put it wherever she wanted (usually it was on her shirt).

    I guess just give him time and space and he'll eventually figure it out on his own.

  14. Pampers now has a program called "gifts to grow." It has nothing to do with potty training, it's just away for us to get something back from Pampers after spending like $9484384593485.99 on their products.

    They've been putting little white stickers on the insides of their diaper/pullup packages. These stickers have codes that you can enter into your account on Pampers website, and earn points toward a toy or DVD. Most of the prizes are kind of lame, and you have to pay for shipping (sucks) but if you save up a couple hundred points you can get some cool Lego stuff or a tricycle.

  15. oh, I think you get points for diaper wipes too, but I'm not sure about that because I hate Pampers wipes.

  16. My kid will be three in March and we are experiencing the very ame thing.

  17. I am so hearing you today!!

    my Wee One turned 3yo TODAY, NOT potty trained, only when he chooses, which is rarely.

    He is getting better tho but continues to crap his drawers....he sneaks off, somewhere he cannot be seen and does his business, NOT in the bathroom. grrrrr, but I am being patient. He will get 'housebroke' eventually, I am certain of that.

    My oldest sister J is a child psychologist for a certain school system in N.MI. I have all her numbers on speed-dial for parenting advice. She also says, this cannot be rushed, he'll do it when he is good and ready.But motivation such as a bribes, making a big deal with a small party,books, possibly a doll that goes potty to help ect.. are all things she has suggested. Ive tried it all but the doll thing.

    Pampers and Huggies have taken enough of our money that I could have PUT BOTH of my boys thru medical school on that load of cash....sigh

    I am being patient.

    did I mention that son#1 was potty-trained when he was 1 and a half years old? Yep, sooooooooo NICE!!

    He could barely talk but he sure as hell could use the toilet anywhere/anytime......sigh. guess Wee One isint as ambitious as his older bro....

  18. My mom used gumballs. She bought a little, plastic gumball machine and when we used the potty, she wuold give us a penny for the machine.

    I guess it was her last resort. She tried everthing else, but that one worked.

    Another lady she knows currently has like 5 kids. She potty trains them at two years old, claiming they resist more as they get older. I guess she uses training pants and takes them to the bathroom every hour. I have no idea how she manages her time to do that!

  19. rat: read the title before you read. maybe that will help!

    bhd: kid is not interested in stickers much. (for which i am kinda grateful) but i am willing to try it. cuz I would love to get gold stars when I poop. poor elmo. he didnt get any stars.

    Header: I need to add you to my links!

    mist: which paper do you suggest? the times?

    Stephen: ha. you ARE an artist! can I call you pollock?

    Songbird: the kid hates being naked! I take off his diaper, and he immediately wants to put it on again! its worth a shot. Naked Saturday! heh.

    s@bd: well, thanks for visiting anyway! we can shudder in the corner together.

    satan: I blame you for everything anyway. and my soul is already out on loan.

    deepok: you're welcome.

    Rita: GRANDdaughter!? you are too young ;-)

    Loops: love ya! thanks for the info. yea, legos would be the ticket. shit, anything back from that investment would be nice.

    goddess: yea. wonder if we could interest them in giving out a few college scholarships? Man, son #1 is motiated, eh?

    Lbug: ah... gumballs. I am more likely to get results with lollipops. that seems to be his candy interest. And i wish i would have been that proactive at 2. she is probably right with the "older they get the more they resist" theory!

    my verification word is just for you girls...

    KOOTX :lol:


  20. Oh thats a tough one, My girlfriend bought this kids book called EVERYONE POOPS. serious I have read it. Anyways her daughter was having this same problem and would hold it till she was sick the book and a little "bribery" also she would let her (I know it sounds gross) but she let her daughter see that she poops too. and talked to her about it ALOT. It worked it only took about 2 weeks

  21. thanks musings. I really need to do some concentrated effort on this issue. I want him to change schools next year, and he has to be out of diapers by then!


  22. Got to your blog via Loops. Love it!

    On the potty training front, I am with you: got also a 3-year old and we're still working on that training business. We've tried with videos, books, Elmo... everything. Yet, when he picks it up for a couple of days, he ends up stopping it... out of the blue.

    So, any tips you have or things you learn along the way would be highly appreciated.

    This is my blog:
    and my son's:

    Take care and keep up the cool blogging!

  23. Thanks for the brilliant advice!

    Thinking of those Guinness commercials now ... BRILLIANT!

    Have a great weekend with Mr. Poopy Pants.

  24. I know that I'm late getting in on this, but I have a suggestion. When I was training my oldest, I let her pick out her own big girl panties. It worked. She much preferred the tightie whities to the poopies pampers. Not much of a suggestion, huh? Just thought that I would throw in my 2 cents.