There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Tuesday, December 5

Child Care

Okay people who think you got it soooo difficult... I got some not so great news today. Thankfully its not life threatening or terminal, just inconvenient. On top of what I am already dealing with, I got a call from the state assistance office that is suplementing my daycare costs saying, "You make TOO much money, so you have to pay full time daycare costs. We are cutting you off!" Now this is a very big chunk of change, for those of you parents that know my pain, you understand this scary thought. Especially you CA residents. Daycare costs can cost you as much as the mortgage on your house, or rent for your apartment. And that is not for a school, or a high up daycare, that is for moderate well kept daycare.

I am Not going to be able to get child support, as I hear that the boy's daddy is very very ill. And I have not heard from him since the baby was born. My son's "other grandmother" has not contacted me in over a year. Besides, she is NOT responsible for her son's responsibilities.

How do people manage this? I mean I am not even sure that I shouldn't quit the job I love so much to make less money to save money. Does that make any sense at all? NOOOOO. Maybe I should ask AHHHNOLD for the money.

I am about to go crawl into a corner and just start humming and drooling until the holidays are over. Try not to miss me too much.

blech. I hate self pity! No worries. I will get by. Even if it means putting the kid out on the street in costume and making him preform a scene from the Christmas Carol all weekend long...


  1. Want to see some “real” flower power?

  2. awww man, now that really sucks!!

    I KNOW how much $$ childcare costs.

    Is your son eligible for social security from his bio-father? Id be sure to check into it.

    this is one of the reasons I HATE people who mooch of the government, welfare suckers who draw checks and food stamps when they can get out and work just fine. ack! I could go into a rant but I wont,,

    You are getting a raw deal, it sucks.

  3. Oh, sweetie, so sorry to hear that's happening. That's horrible. I hope things get better.

  4. That's awful,Mem

    Like Barngoddess said.. Check on the SS stuff.
    I know about the daycare too. I had two kids in it, since they were babies..
    I can't imagine in a place like California, where everything is 4 times more than anywhere else...
    I guess you pay dearly for the view of the

    Good Luck to you..

  5. that does really suck :(

    dont get me started on day care. Here on long island, a professional day care place, 5 days a week, will cost you about $1000 a month...

  6. Wow, that sucks!! What, are they figuring that your only living expense is child care?!

    Sorry that you're going through this and I hope you find a way to work this all out. Hang in there.

  7. Paying for daycare sucks ass! I have one more year to go and then boy starts regular school. I'll be saving $400/month after that. I'm sure you pay more than that in CA.

    I actually waited 5 years between kids because I knew I'd never be able to afford to pay daycare for two at the same time.

  8. ARG that sucks!
    I hope you find a suitcase full of money somewhere:)

    We get a gst(tax) rebate here but it's only for lower income families and so they've cut us off.
    Funny,I never thought I made too much money!

  9. That's the problem with the government. They are destroying the middle class by claiming we are all 'rich' as in we make too much money when in fact, we're scraping by paycheck to paycheck. The low income thing is set too low. Sorry about your problem!

    Maybe set up a link on your site? Then you can get paid for writing here and it can help a little with daycare?

  10. Dirk: yea! bring it on, brother man!

    Goddess: Its true. I decided when I was pregnant to not take money from the leeching emotional vampire that is his father, but SS would be worth looking into. Problem being it brings him into our lives. Nope. I wish him well, and set him free. Other things will come.

    Karma: Its going to be fine! thanks for the concern dear. :HUG:

    Steph: yea I could have made a better choice in location, but since I have been here, most all of the aspects of my life have turned around! And the views are worth it. I am going to be hard pressed to ever leave here. Thanks for the encouragement besides! :hug:

    Slyde: think we are in the wrong business? Problem is you never get to vacation running a daycare facility.

    Velvet: Yes. Hanging! Thankfully my kid is fun, and CA is Gorgeous. I am just going to have to do some research and suck it up!

    Nonny: you sound smart! yea. its probably close to the same. sighs. Its only for a nother year.

    MsI: yea me either! I never thought i made TOO much money! there should be a tax break for single family incomes anyway. ARGGGGG

    LBug: can we rant together about that one? Is it our fault that the men and women who decide on our governing policies can't find this as a viable issue? Too busy playing war i guess. And thanks for the suggestion. I doubt much income could be derived from my writing, despite your kind words!

  11. Sorry I'm late. Let me join in the suckage part. Hmm, that doesn't look good. My bud (from Cali) to this day is paying child support. His kids are grown and married. Research Mel. If i can help...

  12. I was going to ask if you have an Order adjudicating him as the father....even if it doesn't mention support.

    That way, if he should die, your son would be entitled to benefits from Social Security.

    I worked as a paralegal in child support enforcement for 12 years.

    leave a comment at my blog if you have any questions.

    I might be able to offer some suggestions. :)