There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Monday, April 30

I thought I was half dead.

I am on a diet. So my coworker and I walk to Subway at least once a week. Today was our Weight Watchers meeting. I lost 4.4lbs!! wOOt. Mucho pats on the back for me! I have come a long way this year.

The subway closest to our offices is about 3/4 a mile. A good stretch of the legs. So after our meeting (yea me!) off we go to the Subway where english is the second language. I get in line to get the Monday special. Turkey and Ham. YUMMY! (There are so many stories I have from my walks to this specific subway.) After going through the veggie questions, and pay for our meal, we start to walk outside. I noticed this smallish man in line staring at me. I thought, I shouldn't look at him and lock eyes. Then as I approach and notice he is still staring at me, i realize the truth. The man is checkin out my rack! :giggles:

and here I thought I was an old saggy has been. giggles.

The Loquat

I had a virgin experience today. I ate a loquat. Yum!

The skin is a soft yellow color and very tender. There is not much fruit mostly seed. They are about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. Now I am sitting here wondering how to use these little fruits to make jelly or in a recipe.

I have to get back to cooking at home more often. I love it. And there are so many new varieties of foods here in California, I am robbing my taste buds of some seriously exciting experiences.

Anyone eaten a loquat?

Sunday, April 29

For Some Reason

I have started three of my six dream journals with that exact phrase. I have the worst grammar skills. I guess I never really listened in class. I usually write according to the way I think or speak.

So all you teachers and grammarian word-smiths that peruse my exposure here, please bear with me until I can re-educate myself.

and thank you for your patience.

Friday, April 27

S. Heart

I wanted to say that I love someone. Sorry that I have been so difficult to get along with lately. Thanks for being there for me. I wish you were here with me. I miss you.

I love you baby.

Thursday, April 26


You know what the best part of a bagel is to me? that crunchy skin after it has been toasted. Today is bagel day at the office. And due to the desire to love myself more, I have started eating only half. (I have lost 15lbs to date, and I plan on losing all the weight I need to by this time next year.)

bring on the low fat cream cheese and a toasty bagel please. with sesame seeds. YUMMY!

Wednesday, April 25

That Many Visitors? Smiling!!

I started this blog maybe a year ago, when I first moved here (to California). I did it because I was having "Blogger" issues with my old site. Thought starting fresh would be a good idea. And so the continuing saga of my life began.

I signed in this morning, looked down and my counter and I was the 5000 visitor! (I am sure at least 1/3 of that number is hits from me) Now for some of the other bloggers on my list, they reached that their first few months, because they are wittier and more colorful. All that said, I am so thankful to all that pass here bestowing me with their wisdom and insight. You provide me laughter, joy, and allow me to see a part of your life. Thank you for sharing, and letting me share in kind.

I need a pedicure. Its time to update the feet picture in celebration! :wOOOt:

Tuesday, April 24

Schnozzler Horn

I live in an apartment complex, and every morning, I can hear my neighbor blowing his nose. Seriously its about 7:30 AM PST there is at least two or three serious honks on the old schnozzler horn. It informs me that its time to be out the apartment and onto the bat cave. Tally ho and away we go.

i am late today. I am still in my pajamas, and the horn is honking. :giggles:

Monday, April 23

Monday Thoughts.

Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up. Pearl S. Buck

I am going to seek therapy. I have bad feelings that I want to go away, and I am incapable of doing that alone. Wish me luck.

Friday, April 20

the dentist

my son went to his first dentists appointment today. I was prepared for the worst. this kid was a star!

He was polite and positively responsive the whole time. And didn't freak out when she scraped his teeth, put the suction tube in his mouth, or made him bite down on those awful negative plates for x-rays. He is going to go far if he is going to be that open to new experiences and accept them.

I don't know how much of this I am responsible for, but I was so proud. What a stellar little soul. So tolerant. He will have a blessed life with such an attitude. Good for him.

Wednesday, April 18

I needed some mindless fun today.

Your Celebrity Boob Twin:

Anna Nicole Smith

ooo dead celebrity boobs... YIKES!


I am a

What Flower
Are You?

"Mischief is your middle name, but your first is friend. You are quite the prankster that loves to make other people laugh."

Tuesday, April 17


I went over to the YMCA last night to get in a walk, and let the kid play with some kids his own age. (little prayer here: please provide an opening for my child at this pre-school). I put on my comfy pants, and T, and hit the self propelled mat, Plugged into Nano land, and tuned out.

Now as in any good gym, they have televisions that you can watch while you are walking. (in my design vision, i would have made an entire wall of trees, and nature showing while you walk, and play a nature sound track... :giggles:) The televisions are in couples. Two on one end, two in the middle, two on the other end. I was in the middle, so a nice view of the middle couple. On one television was the story of the shootings at Virginia Tech and the other one had the Home Run Derby on ESPN. So I see the cops uniforms on the one side, and the baseball uniforms on the other. I thought how fucking ironic is that! Celebrating talent of home run hitters, and the rewarding sound of the bat cracking, next to the horror of some poor man who had no grasp of reality, and a loaded weapon. What did that sound make? Then I started thinking, and looking at the difference in the uniforms. Each was wearing a uniform necessary for his function. Then, as the rambling of an ADD mind goes on, I thought what kind of uniforms do we all wear?

The poor student who was off balance for whatever reason and went out to rid himself of whatever he perceived was torturing him. What uniform was he wearing at the time? Who did he see himself as? And policemen choose to wear their uniforms. They have a vision that is ingrained, trained and protective. But what kind of uniform do each of us wear?

A spiritual leader wears a uniform to enlighten us to our souls, in connection with a God of your choosing.

A salesman wears the uniform of a provider, a sometimes pushy self preserving provider, but none the less, he provides.

A teacher wears a uniform of learning. A uniform that changes colors as the need for learning changes.

An artist wears a uniform of reflection. Reflecting visions of what they see in a form of non verbal communication.

Do you wear a uniform? Or do you change uniforms as the moment insists? Being a mom, I wear many uniforms. I change during the day to keep up with the whirlwind sponge that lives with me.

Anyway, just a few thoughts I had while treading on the mill of life. :wink:

Monday, April 16


i do love it so. But saturday, I loved it too much. We went to an art show on Saturday night they had outdoors next to my apartment. We decided since we lived so close, that was a great way to spend a windy Saturday night.

There are a few pics on my flikr site, but I am still working on my camera skills. I was kinda glazed over from the drinks, I didn't think to work on the aperture=available light equation. Not going to post them here. If you know me, you know where to look.

Dream journal is up and running though. I really need to put something next to the bed to be more accurate, and to remember more of what I dreamt!

Dayum, sunday was a long one. I hate hangovers. that is why I only drink like that every once in a while. sighs.

Go to google maps and get directions from New York, NY to Paris France. Look at number 23 on the list and then laugh. guaranteed that was the highlight of that persons day to write that.

Wednesday, April 11


It doesn't come in a perfect shape or size.
It doesn't come with personalized instructions.
It comes at you like it is.

Appreciate its less than fine moments if you can.
They are just as important as the finer moments.
Without them, we have no balance.

I need more balance on the sleeping side though. I feel like the un-dead today. You know its bad when even coffee isn't making a dent.

I started a dream journal. do you know anyone else who does dream journaling? if so, leave me a footprint or a trail to follow. I am interested. thanks.

Tuesday, April 10


Stop taking my picture! This was his easter outfit. I hope you all had wonderful holidays.

PS: Please go and give my SISTOR a hug. She is kinda bummed this week. I know her last entry wont say, but, she got some bad news. So just do it. Give that woman a hug.

thank you all.

Monday, April 9

One more pound

I feel like a turtle on the way to this final weight loss, but I am making progress. I hate dieting with a passion. I like to eat. oh well. time to grow up i guess and be disciplined. blech.

I did though lose one more lb this week! :clap:

sorry I have been so boring lately peeps, i am supremely in the "weeds" as you would say in the restaurant biz.

More laters....

Thursday, April 5


Okay. We all have family of some kind. I want you to go and visit my little sister's BLOG. She is just starting up, and could use some encouragement. She is a groovy chick, working on makin a baby, lives in Napa amidst a vineyard and is married to a really cool guy. Some people have all the luck.

Her toes aren't as pretty as mine though.. neener neener!

Think Think Think

I had a great topic while i was driving, then forgot it. Reason? I think toooo much. seriously.

Something about my asthma medicine coming with a new propellant, and how I must be completely uninformed about where the world is going. I listen to NPR in the car for about five minutes between daycare and my job.

I don't get to read anything for any length of time. I have 5 Rolling Stones magazines sitting on my table and a few Vogues too that I would LOVE to go through. I never get to be alone for that matter.

I have not had a moment to myself, even in the bathroom, for about 6 weeks now. Do I sound like a broken record yet?

Two Quotes I saw today (both by geekazoid TR):
How am I going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I'm commited to?

If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten. - Tony Robbins

I need to work on that. NO... I AM working on that! :clap: (gives herself a big hug)

Tuesday, April 3

Hey everybody!

What color are your eyes? Mine are blue.

Sunday, April 1

No more whining.

SB Beach

Please excuse my clone for pouting and pissing in the last entry. what a WHINER!!! You know, you raise the clone from a few good genes, you never expect a mutation. :wink:


Frack. tomorrow's Monday again isn't it? gotta get out to the beach for a long walk. seeee ya! (yes, that is Santa Barbara, and I took it)