I am searching for a new mate. Someone that likes to smile, laugh, and generally have a good time. Must like all kinds of movies, popcorn and root-beer. Enjoys all kinds of music, making love in the rain, and long walks on the beach. Must be patient, like kids, have his own car, and a job (or his own income). I desire someone open minded, sensual, semi-creative and male. If you can't cook then you must be willing to do dishes and take out trash. Living within a days driving distance of Santa Barbara is crucial for those late night needs. Enjoys an adult beverage now and then, but doesn't end up in the gutter at closing time. Being mature and responsible are a given, but being impulsive at times is so good for the soul. So, sit down, take a number, and then we can discuss options and your requirements.
One final note, did I mention kissing? Because the position requires kissing, lots and lots of kissing.
I look forward to hearing more about your "qualifications". Thank you for your time.
Smile? you going to apply? ;-)