There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Friday, August 24

What makes a smile...

Why do I retain such an idealistic vision of the world? I put up a picture I just painted as a reminder that there is so much more to me than what I don't have.

Today I am sad. I am trying to let go of something. Something I want so very very much, but have to set it aside until things change. And I am working on building something back up. A trust that has been lacking for so long, I am not even sure I can get it back. One day at a time. I am breathing, being in the now and making choices for my higher good.

And smile? I don't know what else to say. I miss you. did i mention that i miss you? sighs...

May all your weekends be bright and colorful. Mine sure is going to be. I plan on keeping busy!!! Have to find a smile again! ;-)


  1. Well, M, the word verification to
    post is this: eatcum

    Is google starting to fuck with
    people on some new level that I'm
    unaware of? Cunts.

    There is a difference, Melanie,
    between wanting something, and
    being upset because I don't have
    it. One is here, and the other
    usually just out of site. But, the
    two are different.

    As to the trust. That's more
    difficult to me. Trust is what
    everything else is built upon. When
    that goes, it's like a house built
    on sand. My trust is valuable to
    me, and it must be earned.

    Trust is a big one.

    Have a fucking great weekend.

    - -
    Father Luke

  2. I'm working on letting go of someone right now, someone that means more to me than life itself. I hate it and it sucks but it seems to be necessary. So yeah, just breathe, one breathe at a time, one day at a time, one moment at a time....

    Love the painting by the way. :)

  3. father: trust must be earned. and once broken, its broken. can't be mended.

    karma: i wish you all the good vibes I can muster right now. you deserve happiness. :HUG: