Friday, September 28
The most reflective part of my day is while driving. Its the time of day when I have time to focus on whats up with me. Despite all the other people on the road, driving is a meditative process for me. Left, Right, stop, go, fairly simple. I actually can reflect and hear myself thinking. So this morning during driving meditation time, I was sparked with an awareness of my negativity. Yea. Its annoying.
I found myself saying things that were negative and oppressive. You are late, because you can't ever be on time, you are lazy, etc. I caught it. Realized it was happening. This is a rare occurrence when I actually stop beating me up. I felt so proud of myself at that moment. Then, I thought, look at how you treat yourself. Why would you expect anyone else to treat you better? Start looking at the things that are good about you. Begin with canceling out this "negative about self" speech.
Now granted, I am imperfect, being human and all. There are times when I am going to flub and falter, and royally muck up the muckity muck. But beating myself up about it is a waste of energy. And its non-productive. Acknowledge and move on. And love thyself without being a martyr. mantra established.
Speaking of the monkey on my back, I have to find a monkey suit (somebody wants to be curious george for halloween). awesome right?
happy weekends my friends.