There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Friday, October 14

The games people play

I have had a long life of games with men. I have been verbally abused and physically assaulted by my partners. I have also been emotionally abandoned by my partners. I understand that in life we make our choices to how we are treated, and in observing my history, it breaks my heart that I felt so low for so long. I have allowed my low self esteem to keep me deep in self pity and anger. It kept me in abusive relationships because I didn't believe I deserved any better. Now, I realize those truths and I can't go back there. Please don't make me.

I am up a few branches and can see the road a bit more clearly. I see now that I am done with games. I am done with useless words and hidden agendas. I cherish honesty, I cherish connection. If you can't step in the light with me, then I will leave you behind. That isn't a personal attack, its avoiding wasting anymore time on people that want to keep living in the same ole shaite. Living the same pattern over and over again creates illness in mind and body, and keeps the blame outside of self. As you know, there are no coincidences in life. If you choose to keep your hands over your eyes, then your playground will never change and you will continue to have self absorbed people using you.

That being said, if your choices are as such, enjoy the games! I am sure the costumes and conversations will be sparkly!!!! You know, in a cheap taped together Disneyland wanna be sorta way. I am seeking guru's of truth, who speak to me with words of kindness, connection, and whole hearted sharing, nothing held back, bringing to both of us all the glory this universe has in store!! You could come along with me, if you have the guts to ride the big waves. If not? I pray your choices will satisfy you. My heart wishes you love, light and peace in all your endeavors.

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