There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love,
but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
Pearl S. Buck

Friday, June 21

He actually said to me

"I had to see who was calling as my new found status made me question whether or not I would answer the call."

I just rolled my eyes and laughed. I realize it was a joke, in some ways. He is the BIGGEST geek i have ever met and wish him all the happiness and wealth he can imagine, because he has worked for what he has, and continues to "beat the street" for opportunity.

Honestly, I  realize I am still learning how to walk through a landmine quickly and with stealth. He is part of that education. And for that? I will give gratitude. Each day has brought me a new way to see who I am is so unique and powerful.

One day I hope to write (or visually manifest) a manual of how to maintain dignity, respect and honor to self while reaching your ultimate goal, and see opportunity instead of dispair.

Saturday, June 15

Dark Lady

You came to me in a dream,
dressed as death,
as an old woman in a cloak
offering me an apple.

When I invited you in
I put your apple on the counter
and finished making cookies
inquiring, do you want some tea?

You kindly accepted
we shared tea and cookies
you excused yourself to the bathroom
you returned as yourself

You smiled at me
I said to you, I knew it was you
then we laughed 
and you went out to enjoy your day

i tossed the apple and smiled
I know who I am
I know who I am to you
Ill be glad when someone feels the same for me

Friday, June 14

Call me irresponsible...

So, continuing to tell someone you love them with NO reciprocation to your extension of heart promises, how wise is that? Is that irresponsible? What would Shakespeare do?

Hell, I am NO guardian of the society of man, I am no preacher or life learned sage. I do know that what the heart wants, it wants. I do know that I wont fight that tidal wave because surfing it is MUCH more productive and rewarding.

Im not building a house for us bb, nor am i going to starve myself as you are starving me. I remain true to my words, and live a life that is moving in a direction that physics and science are moving me towards, receiving the kind of love I am giving.

As I have said before, Love without affection is like trying to grow a plant in the dark... long dark cold merciless hours that lead to death. I don't like that game. I wont play it. I wont stop loving you either.

Grow up, child, and turn on the light. Do it for yourself... no one else... heal. xoxoxo

Wednesday, June 12

Whistleblower or HERO?

Edward Snowden: the whistleblower behind the NSA surveillance revelations

The 29-year-old source behind the biggest intelligence leak in the NSA's history explains his motives, his uncertain future and why he never intended on hiding in the shadows


Anyone who has the courage to stand up in the face of atrocity has my support. I would front line for this man, and it saddens me to think how many people wouldn't. How is it acceptable to call ourselves a free state, when we allow ELECTED government to spy on us at any time of their choosing? Do you understand the risks involved, the opportunity for anything you do, including the kind of medication you are on, or any private personal information you discuss with friends or family on the phone, online, in emails, etc they could use against you in any way IF they got the inclination to do so? And what sets off a person to DO so? Sheesh. Forget the president, this is our PEER group, hired by a private firm which does business for our ELECTED government. Wise up americans, Wise up. 

Sunday, June 2


I have to say I love it. Hiking, sleeping in the woods, the smell of campfire smoke, even the not bathing for a day or two is OK, thats my only beef with it, no shower.

I was there working on trying to get my mind off problems around me, loving people that ignore me, money issues that have plagued me for two years, and honestly, it worked.

Solution? More camping, and more camping attitude. Be who I am because thats pretty darn cool, as was attested to by the people that I was camping with.

Camping at the beach again SOOOn!!!!!!